Dorothea Helms

Humour Writing (Magazine, Newspaper, Etc.)

  • CBCPARENTS.CA – “How  Spoiling a Dog Taught Me To Be The Grandparent I’d Always Wanted To Be,” November 2018
  • uxperience – annual musical-variety show to raise money for local charities in Uxbridge, Ontario. Skit-writing/performing team, 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019
  • 2nd Place in Gene Perret’s “Words to Live By” one-liner contest. August 2014.
  • Semi-finalist in HumorPress.com’s April/May 2011 Humor Writing Contest – “Food Foibles”
  • Word Weaver (newsletter of The Writers’ Community of Durham Region) – The Writing Fairy® Eat My Dust column. January 2009 – present
  • ArtsBridge (newsletter of the Uxbridge Arts Association) – The Writing Fairy® column. June 2009 – 2010
  • The Writing Fairy™ Humour Writing Contests, 2006 – 2008 – ran the first-ever international contest under the “Fairy” banner, provided monetary prizes to winners.
  • Lichen literary journal (now LICHEN Arts & Letters Preview) – Hooked on Words, Spring 2004.
  • CBC Radio 1 – “First Person Singular” segment Morning Show broadcast September 6, 2001 – Call a Pain a Pain
  • Stitches: The journal of medical humour. My Friend Menopause. November, 2000
  • Toronto Sun. Regular monthly humour column in “Career Connection” special section. A Funny Thing Happened. February, 2000 to October, 2001; various humour articles for special sections (Niagara Falls, Electronics Guide, etc.) November, 1999 to August 2002
  • Metroland Publications. Various humour articles for “Today’s Homes,” “At Home in York Region,” “There’s No Place Like Home,” “Careers 2003” (ongoing)
  • Stitches The Journal of Medical Humour. New Help for OCD Sufferers. October, 1999
  • Writer’s Digest. Your Assignment #85 Honorable Mention – Humorous Valentine Wish June, 1997.
  • Big Buck. How to Hunt Men. Summer 1997 issue
  • Faculty member at 2nd Annual Nebraska Sandhills Humor Writers’ Conference in Broken Bow, Nebraska, June, 1996
  • REM (Real Estate Magazine) August 1996. Where’s an Iconomatic When You Need One? Or How Saint Joseph and a For Sale Sign Changed My Life
  • Popular Woodworking Get Those Lines Straight. July, 1994
  • Woodworker Eat Your Heart Out, Helen of Troy. January, 1995
  • Woman’s World Kids’ Sayings. March 2, 1993
  • The Business and Professional Woman I’m All Ears. Nov 93
  • “Black Phoenix Rising” (newsletter of the Klingon Assault Guard of Canada)
  • Regular humorous feminist column entitled All Things Klin
  • “The Other Side O’ the Ship” (newsletter for The Steel Talon KAG Canada.). Article on Klingon poetry
  • “Roller Coaster.” Kids Say the Darndest Things! July, 1994
  • Big Buck Magazine. The Feminist Bowhunter. Summer, 1995
  • TVO Newsletter. Crackdown. April, 1995